Another Time , Another Place ,Another Me

Was it really just last year  that we were going through yet another mild Gulf Coast  winter?

My daughter and I's  regular early evening walks captured  in snaps I took  now sit  in my computer files documenting those  moments  .

I look at them  ever so often and remember  this time of year fondly  ,as it was the calm before the  rising heat and humidity that was usually just weeks away.

The thought of hurricane season in the months ahead also crept into our minds on those sunset  strolls  as we had just  experienced fleeing from Rita 4 months earlier.

 Often we'd complain about our lives  with my parents , and how tired we were of specifically my mother's  domineering personality , rages and unhappiness which chewed on our everyday lives something fierce.

The thought of leaving hadn't quite entered anyone's  mind yet at that point.

Finding ways to live under those conditions  ate a lot of our energy , often we felt like caged animals  being prodded with sticks .

There were actually some peaceful moments , but those were few and far between . Usually occurring when she was off  taking care of her house and business in Germany  for a month at a time .

We went to live with them right after my husband was killed , although they helped to a certain degree ( mostly my father ) , and my mother  was  genuinely saddened by what happened to him. She  continually expressed anger  at the new familial situation especially over the last two years .

They always told me they'd be there  if I ever needed them , and I took them up on it.

I think my father truly meant it but my mother, who must always have her way , realized  the loss of power  and just freaked out . Compromise is a word concept  rarely used  or practiced  in her vocabulary.

When we were in pain and  grieving ,she lashed out , and it still was about Her.

My daughter 's  guff level was reached  in May of 2006.

In the end ,my mother's narcicissim prompted us  to get out and  start our own adventures in the frozen tundra of New England. 

Getting out was another  headache  that I detailed  here  from August  to October last year .

The rest is history.